Alright so if you haven't heard it from the movie Mean Girls, you've heard it somewhere else at some time in your life: Halloween is the one day a year a girl can dress up as a complete slut and no one can say a word about it. Right?
Whether at Halloween parties, clubs, jobs that let you dress up, or even in passing at WallyWorld, we've all seen it before, some gal's gotta be wearing lingerie. Either an ass cheak hangin out there, a tit poppin up here, belly buttons pokin out there..you get what I'm sayin.
This year I decided to go a different route. I've been all the comic book chicks in years past and always wore some kind of corset one colour or another. I wanted to be comfortable this year. I didn't want to try to vamp anything. Just wanted to dress up as a recognizable character that would make people go, Oh I see what you did there.
Velma. It was perfect. Awkward. Giant glasses. Large orange sweater wearing adorable nerd with her own kind of classy appeal.
I'm like a modern day Velma...
It was super easy. Short brown hair wig? Check. Overly large Orange sweater? Check. Found it at Ross Dress for Less the week before. This was gonna be cake. Didn't have to go out and spend a ton on a costume, I already have huge prescription frames and awkward Velma boots. I wouldn't be uncomfortable in the club- other than the fact it was damn hot in that thing. The alcohol drowned out any perception I had of temperature though, so it was alright.
But that's not what this story is about. Moving along...
My girl Kandy was lookin fly as the lady hatter, tasteful in her cute little corset over a tutu and matching jacket over top. We waltz up in there not giving a damn. It was ladies night on Halloween night and the place was bumpin, ladies everywhere, guys were barely a trickle in the crowd.
We saw sexy sailor girls, sexy jungle girls, sexy Alice, Jessica Rabbit, gypsies, and of course just the lingerie ladies. Most of the guys had some sort of gory or funny costume. Then there were the toolboxes that just had on unbuttoned button ups wearing shades and called it a costume.
The night was great. The music was bumpin, the people jumpin, and toward the end of the night I'd gone up to the bar again for a drink. The entire bar was packed but a very tall very chocolate Superman had turned to notice me and made room for me to step up. I thanked him with a smile and his eyes went large and his mouth started to drop into an open smile.
"VELMA!" He said.
"Haha, yeah that's me. I'm impressed. Most people tonight notice the character but only get about as far as that chick from Scooby Doo."
"Velma where have you been all my life? I've had a crush on you since I was eight."
Keep in mind, I do believe this man is about mid thirties.
I laugh a bit and thank him. I then notice on the front of his costume it says "Superfly"
"Oh I see what's going on!" As I point at his chest.
"You like it? I thought it was pretty good. Let me buy you a drink."
MAHAHAH Me? Really? Fucking Velma?
"Sure." I smiled.
"What you drinkin baby girl?"
"Gin and tonic. Tanquere."
"Gin? You don't mess around. Yes ma'am."
I allow him to buy me the drink and charm me.
"I must be gettin back to my girl. She's on the dance floor." I make a notion to the floor.
"I understand. Thank you for joining me Velma. Velma, Velma Velma mm. The years have been good to you."
I giggle and saunter back to Kandy.
"Where'd you get that?" She eyebrows at me.
I told her what happened. She smiles and says "Ahhhhhh shit girl!"
We continue to dance, and a while later Mister Superfly comes to the dance floor.
"I've been watchin you," he says moving in to dance with me.
I look to Kandy and she shruggs and laughs with out guys we were with.
I allow the man a dance but part of my posse didn't like the way he was handling me so they kept draggin me back to the pack. Eventually the guy got the gist but before making his way back to the bar, he pulled me away one last time.
"This is my room key. 2430. I want you to join me tonight. No pressure. I understand you got a man over there but if he's not yours then come be mine." He was gesturing my little group who was now eyeing me like I was being killed.
I just smiled at the man, he grabbed my arm slightly and I looked back. "Remember the number?" He asked.
"2430" And I walked away.
Of course I didn't use the key but it was a nice souvenir for the evening and a Halloween to remember. Who needs to sneak into a hotel room when you have a man waiting at home for you?
Either way, moral of the story ladies, out of all those pinups in there, all those sexy, tight bodied, flesh bearing women in the club, the nerdy ass, bulky sweater wearing nerd got the room key. Don't sell yourself short. You don't have to look like a harlot to be wanted. Just have to rock whatcha got :)
Whether at Halloween parties, clubs, jobs that let you dress up, or even in passing at WallyWorld, we've all seen it before, some gal's gotta be wearing lingerie. Either an ass cheak hangin out there, a tit poppin up here, belly buttons pokin out there..you get what I'm sayin.
This year I decided to go a different route. I've been all the comic book chicks in years past and always wore some kind of corset one colour or another. I wanted to be comfortable this year. I didn't want to try to vamp anything. Just wanted to dress up as a recognizable character that would make people go, Oh I see what you did there.
Velma. It was perfect. Awkward. Giant glasses. Large orange sweater wearing adorable nerd with her own kind of classy appeal.
I'm like a modern day Velma...
It was super easy. Short brown hair wig? Check. Overly large Orange sweater? Check. Found it at Ross Dress for Less the week before. This was gonna be cake. Didn't have to go out and spend a ton on a costume, I already have huge prescription frames and awkward Velma boots. I wouldn't be uncomfortable in the club- other than the fact it was damn hot in that thing. The alcohol drowned out any perception I had of temperature though, so it was alright.
But that's not what this story is about. Moving along...
My girl Kandy was lookin fly as the lady hatter, tasteful in her cute little corset over a tutu and matching jacket over top. We waltz up in there not giving a damn. It was ladies night on Halloween night and the place was bumpin, ladies everywhere, guys were barely a trickle in the crowd.
We saw sexy sailor girls, sexy jungle girls, sexy Alice, Jessica Rabbit, gypsies, and of course just the lingerie ladies. Most of the guys had some sort of gory or funny costume. Then there were the toolboxes that just had on unbuttoned button ups wearing shades and called it a costume.
The night was great. The music was bumpin, the people jumpin, and toward the end of the night I'd gone up to the bar again for a drink. The entire bar was packed but a very tall very chocolate Superman had turned to notice me and made room for me to step up. I thanked him with a smile and his eyes went large and his mouth started to drop into an open smile.
"VELMA!" He said.
"Haha, yeah that's me. I'm impressed. Most people tonight notice the character but only get about as far as that chick from Scooby Doo."
"Velma where have you been all my life? I've had a crush on you since I was eight."
Keep in mind, I do believe this man is about mid thirties.
I laugh a bit and thank him. I then notice on the front of his costume it says "Superfly"
"Oh I see what's going on!" As I point at his chest.
"You like it? I thought it was pretty good. Let me buy you a drink."
MAHAHAH Me? Really? Fucking Velma?
"Sure." I smiled.
"What you drinkin baby girl?"
"Gin and tonic. Tanquere."
"Gin? You don't mess around. Yes ma'am."
I allow him to buy me the drink and charm me.
"I must be gettin back to my girl. She's on the dance floor." I make a notion to the floor.
"I understand. Thank you for joining me Velma. Velma, Velma Velma mm. The years have been good to you."
I giggle and saunter back to Kandy.
"Where'd you get that?" She eyebrows at me.
I told her what happened. She smiles and says "Ahhhhhh shit girl!"
We continue to dance, and a while later Mister Superfly comes to the dance floor.
"I've been watchin you," he says moving in to dance with me.
I look to Kandy and she shruggs and laughs with out guys we were with.
I allow the man a dance but part of my posse didn't like the way he was handling me so they kept draggin me back to the pack. Eventually the guy got the gist but before making his way back to the bar, he pulled me away one last time.
"This is my room key. 2430. I want you to join me tonight. No pressure. I understand you got a man over there but if he's not yours then come be mine." He was gesturing my little group who was now eyeing me like I was being killed.
I just smiled at the man, he grabbed my arm slightly and I looked back. "Remember the number?" He asked.
"2430" And I walked away.
Of course I didn't use the key but it was a nice souvenir for the evening and a Halloween to remember. Who needs to sneak into a hotel room when you have a man waiting at home for you?
Either way, moral of the story ladies, out of all those pinups in there, all those sexy, tight bodied, flesh bearing women in the club, the nerdy ass, bulky sweater wearing nerd got the room key. Don't sell yourself short. You don't have to look like a harlot to be wanted. Just have to rock whatcha got :)
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